"This page is really funny!"
If you've been to watch Sheffield Steelers ever, then you'll have heard Dave Simms! He is the match night announcer and also commentates on BBC Radio Sheffield for Steelers away games. One of the biggest rivalries in all sport must be between Sheffield Steelers and Nottingham Panthers, and Dave makes sure everyone is aware of this! In an attempt to be highly amusing in true INTO THE STORM style, there now follows 20 things Dave Simms would never say
There are now 55 things! If you have any more, please mail them me! Many thanks to Dave Simms himself for not only being happy for this page to exist, but also for e-mailing me a number of comments to be included on the page!
If your browser doesn't support embedded sound then you will be missing a 10 second spell of Dave Simms commentary currently playing (if it's loaded yet) that is part of the Sheffield Steelers song Whoosh it's behind you!. You can download the clip by clicking here. It is a .wav file and is approx 80K in size. Incidentally, if anyone has got a WAV clip of Dave Simms REALLY giving it something then e-mail me the clip or the URL of it!
And don't forget, keep your eye on the pies at all times...!From Reverand Richard, Manchester Storm fan (February 1998)
Apologies! My brummie accent is really annoying!From Jon Hammond's Yellow Jacket, Manchester Storm fan (February 1998)
Manchester Storm have been the most consistent team in ISL this season and I'm confident they'll win some silverware!From John Hempstock, Sheffield Steelers fan (February 1998)
The Manchester Storm have more British players than the rest of the Superleague put together!From Carey Herrington, Sheffield Steelers fan (January 1998)
Jamie Leach was the best player Sheffield have ever had!From Carey Herrington, Sheffield Steelers fan (January 1998)
Mike Blaisdell is one of the most respected managers in British ice hockey! (You might not believe it but DS said this along with a lot of other nice stuff about Uncle Blazer and the Panthers at Timmy Cranston's Testimonial)From Carey Herrington, Sheffield Steelers fan (January 1998)
Oy Timmy Cranston, pick on someone your own size!From Puck Bunny, Manchester Storm fan (January 1998)
When I read that 20 things I would never say, I laughed so much I nearly bought a round (at Little Timmy Cranston's bar, naturally)From Puck Bunny, Manchester Storm fan (January 1998)
Don't forget, we never boo the opposition, we just cheer twice as loudly... (etc!)From Puck Bunny, Manchester Storm fan (January 1998)
Corey Beaulieu, is SO misunderstood, he's really a fluffy bunny all squishy and marshmallowy inside!From Becky Lingard, Manchester Storm fan (January 1998)
At the Sheffield v Nottingham game (on Boxing Day 1997) with 1:40 left on the clock he said "2 minutes left in the final period"From Carl Johnstone, Manchester Storm fan (December 1997)
Tonight's shorts sponsors for the Sheffield Steelers are Industrial Pimps! (You might think that he wouldn't say that, but he did at a game last season!)From Mike Jones, Sheffield Steelers fan (December 1997)
Congratulations Panthers, you outplayed us in every department!From Keith Martin, Kingston Hawks fan (November 1997)
Elvis wont be leaving early tonight, he's enjoying seeing us get beat!From Keith Martin, Kingston Hawks fan (November 1997)
Our defence is stronger than OJ Simpson's!From Keith Martin, Kingston Hawks fan (November 1997)
If you'd like to join the players in Tim Cranstons Sports Bar after the game, feel free!From Keith Martin, Kingston Hawks fan (November 1997)
Welcome on to the ice the Slimfast Slimmer Of The Year, Jamie 'VD' Horst!From Keith Martin, Kingston Hawks fan (November 1997)
That Chris Kelland must be as old as my dad!From Dave England, Nottingham Panthers fan (October 1997)
Hey look at that great play by the Panthers!From Dave England, Nottingham Panthers fan (October 1997)
And welcome to tonight's game in the European Hockey League...!From Mike Landers, Manchester Storm fan (October 1997)
Goal number twenty for the Peterborough Pirates!From Andy Donkin, Kingston Hawks fan (October 1997)
Oh no I've got tonsilitis...! (that's what we wish he would say anyway!)From Sarah Kirkland, Nottingham Panthers fan (October 1997)
Sorry can't speak any louder, I seem to have lost my voice!From Sarah Kirkland, Nottingham Panthers fan (October 1997)
Boom Boom Boom Let me hear you say JAGO...!From Simon Knowles, Manchester Storm fan (September 1997)
I wish I was as young as Ken Priestlay!From Simon Knowles, Manchester Storm fan (September 1997)
Please welcome onto the ice LIGHTNING JAAAACCCKKKKKK!From Simon Knowles, Manchester Storm fan (September 1997)
With the team we've got this year we'd be lucky to beat Billingham!From Simon Knowles, Manchester Storm fan (September 1997)
Or one thing Dave Simms would never do... That dance that Jon Hammond does to that song whilst wearing the Storm big hand in the penalty box - you know the one where you look like you're riding a horse or something!From Simon Knowles, Manchester Storm fan (September 1997)
Is there any noise for the Storm? (when we are on the wrong end of a 9-4 tonking)From Mike Jones, Sheffield Steelers fan (September 1997)
You're right, Nicky Chinn does eat pies! (and then 4 months later at Tim Cranston's testimonial, he said more or less that!)From Simon S-M (September 1997)
And tonight's winners at the Sheffield Arena are The Manchester Storm!!!!From an anonymous Sheffield Steelers fan (February 1997)
...anything quietly!!From the Thunderflash editor (February 1997)
I model myself on Jon Hammond .. what excellent suits that man has!From the Thunderflash editor (February 1997)
Come down the the House of Steel next week for a CLOSE encounter against the Storm!From the Thunderflash editor (February 1997)
I'm too modest to say this ........From the Thunderflash editor (February 1997)
Final score tonight Steeeeeeelers 1, Bracknell 5 (oh, errrm...)From the Thunderflash editor (February 1997)
And Steelers really are reaping the benefit from their junior development system!From Graham Goodman, Fife Flyers fan (February 1997)
We're so s--t it's unbelieveable!From James Farrar, Manchester Storm fan (February 1997)
I'm too modest for my shirt!From John Dempstock, Sheffield Steelers fan (February 1997)
I'm a Brummy, so lets hear more noise for Solihull!From Nigel Kenward, Nottingham Panthers fan (February 1997)
As a Sheffielder born and bred .....From Nigel Kenward, Nottingham Panthers fan (February 1997)
Four million for the Steelers, far too much, I wouldn't give you 4 quid!From Nigel Kenward, Nottingham Panthers fan (February 1997)
I'm lost for words!From Nigel Kenward, Nottingham Panthers fan (February 1997)
I can't think of anything sensible to say, so I'll just shut up for now!From Nigel Kenward, Nottingham Panthers fan (February 1997)
Sorry madam, you were only holding that ladder leading up to the radio gantry for me and you were not shaking it, my apologies!From Dave Simms (February 1997)
What a great defence Manchester has!From Dave Simms (January 1997)
Play the new Steelers CD? Not likely, we play only decent music here!From Mike Baggley (January 1997)
What a great coach Mike Blaisdell is!From Dave Simms (January 1997)
No, the Panthers didn't want to get rid of Matt Tricket!From Dave Simms (January 1997)
Is Jeff Hoad on his way out of Nottingham?From Dave Simms (January 1997)
Thankyou for that standing ovation in Lower Parliament Street!From Dave Simms (January 1997)
He shoots...he scores...he must be Brent Bobyck!From Mike Jervis, Nottingham Panthers fan (January 1997)
GOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAL Number 9 for the Panthers!!!!From Matt Plews, Sheffield Steelers fan (December 1996)
Elvis and Alex Dampier have just left the building!From Simon S-M (December 1996)
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